just that, to float. while mother still had PTSD from that time (long ago) a cousin drowned in the midst of a pool party, surrounded by family: rambunctious and so unaware. but you, laughing, held outyour arms, stick-thin but sturdy,bade me lay back and trustthat the water would buoy me: palms spread, looking up and […]

another year almost over, another micro-aggression over social media. #whaddayouknow i should take this with a grain of salt. because people are people and tbh, everyone is just trying to live their best life. so as usual: you do you. and i do me. it got me thinking though: am i living my best life? […]

i find it really hard to be “nice.” with certain people, i find it downright impossible. my excuse is, time and again, they’ve disappointed me. you would think–the number of times it’s happened–that i’d be used to it by now. but…no. every time it happens, i get mad. it spills over. and i can’t keep […]

i have this friend who is a mental health advocate and she suggested i go to a therapist. she arranged it. i went. i had a real Good Will Hunting moment. the “it’s not your fault” scene (only, of course, mine would be about dad’s disappearance and mom stroking out in my bedroom). she offered tissues. […]

what were the hard-hitting questions of the week? in no particular order: how do i freeze time? when will i start this thing i’m supposed to have finished by now? when will i finish this thing i’m writing? why don’t i take photos of people? may K ba akong pumasta ng ‘young, scrappy, and hungry’ […]

Originally posted on thepaidhack:
Latest Update: March 11, 2018, 8:39 p.m. Hello. Salamat sa mga nangungumusta and who have shared my father’s missing poster. We will attempt to answer the Frequently Asked Questions here: 1. Sino ang nawawala? Alfredo “Fred” V. Poblete, 76, lolo, tatay, Bicolano, dating empleyado ng gubyerno. 2. Anong itsura niya? Mahigit-kumulang…

my mother had me when she was 35. dad was 40. so i should have done the math early. but then, i was never very good at math. my mom had her stroke at age 68. she turned 69 in the hospital. we weren’t prepared. she sure as shit wasn’t prepared either. mom told me, […]

…it’s probably true. as with a sunset. it shouldn’t look the same. the last time i spied a memorable sunrise, though, was at a resort in baler. was there on a job, i woke up really early, around 3am or 4am (like this morn), for no reason. so i pulled on a sweater, went out, […]

Since I wrote this (below), President Duterte has said that the gov’t will investigate incidents of “salvage.” And the DILG chief has urged the PNP to investigate the vigilante killings, and have Internal Affairs look into the killings of suspects during police operations. It took months, and hundreds dead, and a lot of protesting–including a statement […]